The wedding ceremony is the social and ritual procedure that transforms a man and a woman into a single legal unit – the married couple. Weddings have occurred almost for as long as human society has existed, and every nationality, ethnicity, and cultural group in the world today has different traditions.

The purpose of the wedding ceremony used to be to demonstrate that the man and woman were willing and able to promise each other and the community in which they lived, to live together and support each other. Nowadays, most couples use the ceremony to demonstrate to their families and friends their love and commitment.

Most wedding ceremonies include a certain number of expected elements – vows, ring exchanges , and the final introduction of the married couple, for example. It also is expected that the wedding officiant will talk for a certain amount of time, saying words of timeless brilliance of course, and in many (but not all), there is a reading, unity ceremony or other special element.

Often, the wedding ceremony also might showcase the couple’s views on the world or their lives, by incorporating more exotic elements that are of importance to one or the other of them. Second marriages usually involve the children of either or both the bride and groom, to emphasize that it is no merely two individuals, but rather two families, that are joining.

If you are limited to a small number of basic elements (by time or finances, both of which are very reasonable and respectable limitations), then use them wisely – work with your wedding officiant to choose the best passages, commentaries or poems to reflect your own particular love, lives and hopes. If you have unlimited time, then (again) use that time wisely to create a wedding ceremony that is more than “really long” – make it interesting (you’ll need to keep people awake, remember), meaningful and memorable.

Try to make a wedding ceremony that reflects your relationship, your perspectives and your hopes. Try to make something that will make you and your future spouse, years down the road, still cry when you read it, and relive your hopes and dreams all over again. Make a wedding ceremony that you will cherish. Make a wedding ceremony that, if your children read it, will utterly shock them, never having imagined before that you could have within such passion, commitment and romance.

And remember - your officiant should be there to help you through all of this – with suggestions, guidance and experience.